Finally

So, I’m finally getting into my blog here and I’m excited! I’ve forever felt that expression through words has been a very strong suit for me and I’m finally putting that to some good use up & public.

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(So, this isn’t the greatest pic to introduce me, but here I am mirror selfie-ing in FDR’s house wussupp heh only pic I could find of me recently on my computer ooph)

I’m never good at introductions, especially when it comes to myself, but I guess that’s a good start! I don’t know. I’m an ambivert sagittarius who feels twenty years older than I actually am. I’m obsessed with the number three. I also am quite obsessed with youtubers, more so the older more original ones, and how they express themselves through what they create and upload. They really have shown me how impactful and special the online community can be and how nice it is to be here! I know when I’m in my ole adult life I’ll look back and will be thanking them for getting me through these teen years. They really are. To name a few that inspire me tons (even though it feels like the list never ends); Marzia Bisognin (who also has a lovely blog here), Grace Helbig, Hannah Hart, Catrific, Zoella, Louise Pentland, Dan & Phil, PJ Liguori, the SourceFed team, and Dodie Clark are some lovely youtube content creators I especially love and look up to. There’s tons more people I could name but I didn’t want to bore anyone with zillions of names heheh…

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I’m very passionate about people, travel, music, art, film, style and the english language. I was born in Santa Cruz, California but lived in Burbank (LA) for my first year of life. (I even took some of my first steps on the Warner Bros. lot since that’s where my dad worked, love that fact sorry). Spent my early school years in Santa Cruz later on and then moved to Nashville, Tennessee when I was 6 or 7. I lived there for most of my life so far. Now I live in Florida, and as I always say, “it’s alright” *in a blatantly sarcastic tone*. I was raised in, what others around me make it seem as, a very different sort of family. My parents are first generation American born children of Italian, and one Polish, immigrants. They were raised in New York; one deep in the city and one far upstate. I’m grateful for having such dedicated parents despite the times we may not get along on everything well. Stupid angsty teen years/ignorance of the elders* amiright? I think I’ll discuss it further in another post though, because I’ve learned a lot from experiences having to do with that, as a lot of us have.

*(PS I actually come from a very open minded family overall, but every family has SOMEONE ya know?)

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Here is my sister, Katie! My only sibling and the best sibling. She has Down Syndrome and is one of the sweetest and smartest people I know. She loves swimming hehe ^_^

I didn’t want to go too in depth on this first post, but also didn’t want it to be too plain and didn’t want to leave anything out I’d regret later on. I’m very much a natural oversharer when it comes to online sharing so forgive meh… I’ll begin to wrap things up…

I’m excited about expressing myself more and more on the web, as so many people I’ve followed and looked up to for ages do. I couldn’t help but follow through with my secret dream of doing what they do, even if I’m not getting paid for it.

To close this, something that has gotten me through tons of boundaries is something Grace Helbig said at her Ramapo Commencement Speech (2015) . I’ve always told myself this in times where I get petty fears of things that I want to do or get done and it’s always helped me:

“Follow your fear”

I have always wanted to venture into the online space and have always wanted to try these things I’ve always dreamed about and have always WANTED to do things but then I become scared to follow through. In times when that happens, Grace’s words always stick with me and help me. And they really have. I make (crappy) youtube videos now after watching and wanting to for over 7 years of time! I’ve reached out to more and more people especially over the web and have even made friendships that have had the wonderful outcome of a collaborative youtube channel! With people from almost every continent! I’ve become more invested in my life as far as ethics and work go and have gotten a better grip on the thought of my future even though ha I’ll never be exactly sure of that ever, the future doesn’t exist yet! *slowly paranoia kicks in…* . My social anxiety has gotten better and I’ve gotten to do things I’ve wanted to do so bad, but didn’t before because I was afraid and worried they could be even the slightest bit uncomfortable. These examples may seem small on the outside, but I struggled a lot internally with pursuing these things and just like everyone, still struggle. It’s only natural! I just got through tons more than I thought I could.

So thank you world, and thank you Grace! Hope anyone reading this follows their fear and ventures into places of their dreams too. And don’t let anyone tell you how small your dreams are either! Dreams are ‘one size only’ and it’s how you personally perceive them and want them to be. I know it’s a simple expression, but please DON’T LET OTHERS’ OPINIONS MATTER when it comes to your dreams. Unless your dreams are harmful, ya know? Then ask for help ASAP!

Thanks again, and hope you didn’t hate reading this!

-Lauren Xx